I’m not really into politics, but this is an issue none of us can ignore.

I wonder how many have come to realize that SOPA isn’t actually about stopping piracy. That’s just a convenient excuse. It’s more about securing the financial interests of well established businesses by stomping out the only grounds on which competition can exist.

If SOPA/PIPA did pass, do you really think piracy would decline in any way? Yeah, exactly. Scared yet?

Stomping out a competitor will be as easy as an accusation of copyright infringement and poof, site gone, content gone, they lose. Half the sites you browse to today started out as a few people with great ideas in a basement and a server. That’s not an exaggeration.

Similar legislation was passed in the EU with copyright extensions. Even though the initial bills did not pass, legislators kept reintroducing the bills over and over (etc.) until they were finally passed. I suspect that US legislation will proceed on a similar course.

If there is one thing I would ask of everyone out there, it’s to vote those who support this bill out of office. If we manage to stop SOPA from passing this time around we need to remain diligent and strike it down every time it comes up afterwards.

Because it will. The powers that be are all about an open market until it comes to protecting their own interests. They have all the money in the world to do it too, all we have is our votes (rather depressing.) I sat down and watched Congress for 10 hours straight as they proceeded to debate the parameters of SOPA. It’s very clear that a majority of the politicians there don’t have the public’s interests at heart. A number of them never even bothered to show up.

So, please do your part. Politics is a whore that most people don’t want to deal with due to it’s brilliantly convoluted nature, but this is something we simply can’t allow.

~Christian

Enjoy the holidays over the weekend.

=)

A number of my friends have recently been complaining about having trouble sleeping, so I decided to compile a list to help the insomniacs out there:

Don’t consume caffeine less than 12 hours before your bedtime. Caffeine stays in your system up to 12 hours after you consume it, even if you don’t feel that perkiness. “Decaffeinated” isn’t the same as caffeine free.

Don’t nap during the day. This may be obvious, but you have to soldier through being tired. Do anything to get the blood moving if you’re tired. I find 100 jumping jacks do the trick every time. Eat smaller meals so you avoid feeling lethargic and skip lunch at work. (It’s a worthless meal anyway.)

Drink plenty of water. Staying hydrated keeps you awake during the day, you sleep better at night and you’re generally healthier.

Don’t eat anything 3-4 hours before bedtime. Avoid beverages with sugar, carbs and caffeine, especially alcohol. You don’t want to ingest things that will spike your energy when you’re trying to wind down.

Earplugs. For those of us who are light sleepers, or have trouble falling asleep these are a miracle. You sleep better at night since noises don’t wake you up. Even if you’re a heavy sleeper, give earplugs a try. If you’re more energized the next day, you don’t sleep heavily enough. Earplugs will present a problem with alarm clocks unless…

You have a strict sleep schedule. When your waking hours are on a whim, so is your sleep. You’ll find you wake up on time when you’re consistently getting to bed by a certain hour. In turn, you’ll get tired around your bedtime. Start getting ready for sleep an hour before bedtime. Wind-down, listen to some gentle music, read, and enjoy the hour of not having to do anything but prepare for bed. Ideally you’ll be asleep before the hour is up.

Take a hot shower before going to bed. It will relax your muscles while giving you time to brush your teeth, floss and rinse. You can even shave if you like; it will save you the hassle in the morning. Multitasking ho!

Exercise. Dreaded movement! Exercise is the hardest of the list, but sweating out the bad stuff during the day helps you snooze better, faster. If you can’t sleep, go for a quick run, jump around, do pushups, squats, or crunches; whatever you need to get that blood pumping. I ran 3.3 miles at 11pm every night in college. I’d come home, take a hot shower and collapse into bed. I felt amazing the next day.

If you’re not operating at 100% it’s much more difficult to pursue your goals.

Do yourself a favor; get some sleep.

It was late at night as I listened to a friend of mine gripe about her troubles. After she vented her frustrations she asked for my advice, which I’m known to give.

“You somehow make stuff not seem so bad and completely manageable.”

“That’s because it is.”

The intensity of any situation is blown out of proportion by our fears. We cling to self-created rules that we feel we need to follow when there aren’t any. Everything in life is manageable. Nothing is as bad as it seems.

Here are five things you can do to help clear the mental and emotional clutter.

Sympathize with someone without being weighed down by sadness. Not feeling bad doesn’t make you a monster; you can’t choose how you feel and you have nothing to prove.

You can’t know the feelings of others, but you can be completely honest with your own. Passive-aggressive behavior is a grade school gimmick. If someone can’t handle direct communication it’s their problem, not yours. Conversely, don’t use honesty as an excuse to be hurtful.

Stop listening to people who keep unloading their emotional baggage on you. Not everything is an emergency, not everything demands your attention. There are many emotional fires you don’t need to help with. Choose carefully.

Re-establish your boundaries when people you’re too nice to keep invading your space. If they continue to violate your boundaries it’s time to cut them out of your life.

Disconnect from any drama. Don’t listen to it, don’t get involved, don’t spread it. Drama is a whirlwind of emotional trash. Ask yourself “Will this matter in 5 years?” Better yet, think back to 5 years ago. Do you remember any of the drama? Is it still worth anything in the present day?

The quality of your character is not measured by how many toxic friends you keep, or by how much shit you stomach. Is a high-class dessert judged by its deliciousness and complementary flavors, or by how much of it there is to go around?

You, are a high-class dessert. Treat yourself like one.

A friend once asked me “When you beat yourself up, does it help you achieve your goals?”

“No.”

“Then why do you keep doing it?”

One of the things I do is write articles for various clients. I have a personal daily quota. And I fail in meeting that quota at least a couple days out of every week. There are days I get nothing done. I tell myself I will, but I won’t. I don’t even enjoy the day off; I spend most of it feeling guilty spotted with attempted efforts. So the next day I’ll try to increase my workload beyond my normal quota. Not only does it almost never work, but then I don’t write anything for the following 3+ days. Imagine how hard it is to get motivated on that 4th day.

We all fail, all the time. It took me years to accept that I was a series of failures punctuated by a few successes. I thought everyone else had it all figured out; I simply didn’t “get it.” Yet punishing myself for not “getting it done” did nothing but provide a disincentive for tomorrow. It made it that much harder to get up the next day excited about working towards my goals.

Instead, start every day as if it’s your first and end it as though it’s your last. Clinging to the failures of the past kills your progress, one day at a time.

“Ok, now hold still.” The alcohol is an unwelcome house guest invading my nostrils. They flare in protest, but to no avail. My left arm feels cold and vulnerable. I close my eyes and listen to the distress signal pierce my brain.

Stabby stabby!

“You’re all set.” The nurse sticks a band-aid on the hole she just made. My muscles feel sore.

I haven’t gotten the flu in 10 years, and it wasn’t because of flu shots.

Prevent yourself from getting sick!

Get enough sleep –  This is number one. When you don’t get enough sleep your immune system isn’t as efficient. You become more irritable when you aren’t fully rested, which means you’ll get stressed more often, more easily.

Don’t stress – Stress destroys your body as it does your mind. Distract your mind with something to do and keep yourself in high spirits. (A post on minimizing stress is coming in the future.)

Eat decently – Your body can’t keep itself healthy if you feed it high octane crap. Even if you consume fast food once in a while, keep the rest of your diet decent. You probably know Vitamin C is essential to keeping yourself in optimal health. Eat oranges (not orange juice) strawberries, bell peppers and other Vitamin C rich foods even if you’re already sick. If all else fails, go to your local drug store and grab Vitamin C supplements.

Brush your teeth religiously – Your mouth is a sewer. Ever notice how terrible your throat feels after sleeping when you’re sick? It’s because your mouth is a breeding ground for all sorts of nastiness. Brush twice a day, and followup with mouthwash.

Exercise – Your body is like a car, the worst thing you can do is leave it sitting in a parking lot. Keep yourself moving every day, even if it’s just 100 jumping jacks or a walk around the neighborhood.

Already sick? Here are some tips to blast yourself back into 100%.

24 hour sleep gauntlet - If I actually get sick, I don’t let myself stay awake. I hate being sick. If you force yourself to sleep your body can devote all its energy into getting you better. I recommend earplugs to prevent being woken up and a sleeping aid to keep yourself snoozing. When you wake up after 24 hours, I guarantee you’ll be feeling a lot closer to 100%.

Call out from work or school – This plays right into don’t stress. School and work are places where you’re likely to feel stressed the most. Use your newly found free time for the 24 hour gauntlet instead.

Don’t lower your body temperature – Despite what you’re fed by drug commercials, your body temperature rising is a good thing. Your body does this to fight off the infection. You become a less-than-ideal host when you’re idling at 101-102. Unless you’re pushing 104, let yourself sweat it out in bed.

Stay hydrated – With all the sweating going on, you need something to sweat. Staying hydrated allows your body to regulate your temperature as needed, while helping you sweat out the bad stuff. Stick to water mostly, although warm (caffeine free) tea with honey is a good way to soothe an aching throat.

Now go flaunt your good health…and whatever you do, don’t get any flu shots. There’s a reason I haven’t had it in 10 years!

“Bend over and pull down your pants.” My mother moved swiftly, gnashing her teeth, her eyes full of hatred. “No, I don’t wanna!” I scramble away in terror. Her hands clench the leather belt, white knuckles only feeding more blood into her cheeks. “You’re just going to hit me!”

“Shutup and do as I say!” the belt strikes my arm, breaking open my skin. “I won’t start counting until YOU stop blocking!” She lashes me again. “Oww!” Two more lashes. “Ok, ok!” I can barely see my jeans through the tears. I expose my boxers and my thighs.

She begins to count…

“One…stop wincing!”

“Two…”

“Three! Move your hand out of the way!”

“Three!”

“Three!”

“Three!! I SAID STOP BLOCKING!”

It was a slow ascent to ten.

The scene above sounds horrific, and at the time it certainly was. I’ll never forget the terror, the anxiety and the trauma of every moment. This happened many times throughout the course of my young life. Recently the news has been buzzing about Hillary Adams being in a similar situation. There is talk of prosecution, jail time and invoking the empathy of everyone within ear-shot.

What a load of theatrical bullshit.

I’m not saying what her father did was justified, I think he’s a fuckhead just like all my relatives who imposed corporal punishment. However you should know that the victim identity will destroy you. It will spread like a cancer into everything and everyone you love, slowly killing everything from within.

I have firsthand experience.

Hillary’s identity will remain that of the victim if she continues to receive this kind of attention. And that sense of identity is going to attract the kinds of men that will continue reinforcing it. If she happens across a good man, who treats her well and they both genuinely love each other, she will eventually poison that relationship. That man isn’t going to do anything to reinforce her feelings of being a victim and so she’ll either create circumstances in which she plays that role again and again or she’ll face losing her identity as a human being.

If she continues playing the victim, even her future children will grow to treat her as one; they will sense it regardless of what she says or does, forcing Hillary to discipline them like her parents did her. She’s not going to have the personal strength to enforce her parenting in any other way. Or she’ll simply let her children walk all over her.

If you are a victim there is no escape. No amount of revenge, vengeance, anger, or punishment against your oppressors will help the problem. You will always identify as the victim (whether you realize it or not) unless you can forgive with no strings attached. We often demonize our parents and caretakers, removing from them things like human emotion. We don’t see the failing marriage, the non-existent sex life, the lack of relief, the inability to cope with the universe.

As children and adolescents we only see ourselves in that moment and our immediate pain. We are self-centered beings; there is no right or wrong associated with that, it’s simply how it is. In that same sense, we as viewers of Hillary’s beating can only see that moment in time, feel her immediately experienced pain. Therefore we can only react as a child would in the same situation; our judgment would be just as flawed.

Imprisoning the father will only create more hate and resentment. Blaming the victim does nothing either. Whatever stake you feel you have in this matter, realize that crusading for Hillary isn’t doing her any favors; you’re only feeding her victim’s identity, which is ultimately her greatest problem.

This happened over 5 years ago. It’s time to stop being a victim. She isn’t a teenager trapped in an abusive household that child protective services failed to take away. The time of intervention has passed. Hillary is a fully grown woman who has the choice and ability to get away from the situation that once made her miserable.

The last thing she needs is her identity as a victim being reinforced by the moments that imposed it in the first place.